December – holiday’s – family gatherings – (Ok, I’m getting anxious just writing about it.) This month you’re probably holding on for dear life, feeling an overload of anxiety. Some have shared with me that they mentally block out the entire month.
Not an easy time of year! And I’m not going to try to convince you otherwise. Many of us are desperately missing our loved ones, feeling lonely, stressed about finances, and just not feeling the whole holiday joy. Grief shakes us to our core, leaving us exhausted, irritable, sensitive, and ultra-emotional. (This is normal and you’re not alone!)
I tend to over-functioning during this time. It keeps my mind busy. I do almost all of my Christmas shopping online and I pray for January to come as quickly as it can. I’m not trying to sound depressing; I’m being totally honest.
Even as a medium, knowing without a shadow of doubt that there is an afterlife and our loved ones are still with us, I still have many triggers that take me back to that dark place. – Holidays – major trigger.
But honestly, one of the things that helps me is helping you. I know… sounds crazy, but I sincerely mean it. I love bringing through messages from loved ones. I love engaging on my Facebook page. I love reading your comments and thoughts. You may have even noticed how I have been posting a lot more than usual. That’s because YOU help me, just as much as I may help you.
I’d like to share a few tips that really help me and hope that they will help give you some strength during these difficult days, too. If you have any to share back with me and the rest of the readers, please share them in our comments section below.
- Take naps when you can.
Rest can be incredibly cathartic. Grief and depression take a tremendous amount of energy out of our bodies. When you feel like all you want to do is give up, retreat to your bed with a warm cup of tea (or beverage/snack of your liking) and allow yourself to relax and rest. - Talk to others.
Whether it’s a close friend, therapist, or even a stranger, talking about your feelings is a huge help. The mere aspect of knowing that you are not alone is a huge comfort. Not everyone will understand your level of grief, but every now and then, you will find someone who “gets it” and connects with you on a soul level of understanding. And you never know whom you’re also helping along the way. - Go online.
You will be amazed at how many support groups are out there in cyberspace. I have made some wonderful friendships and connections with kindred folks from all around the country (and world!) online. Hearing different stories and perspectives continues to encourage me. There are some amazing people out there that I might have otherwise never “met”. - Exercise.
Even something as simple as a brisk walk can release stress and anger. Grief can turn into aggression and the healthiest way to release is by releasing it in a productive manner. Find something to focus on (like a punching bag!) It does wonders! - Honor your loved one.
Plant a tree in their memory. Donate a gift in their honor. Volunteer your time. I swear to you – helping others, feels good.
Over the next few weeks, rather than torture yourself by trying to meet everyone’s expectations of what you “should” be doing and how you “should” be feeling, honor you and what is right for you. Only you know what you’re up for doing.
Trust that feeling deep inside your soul and do what you feel you need to. Take care of you.
How do you cope with the holidays? Do you feel extra stressed and exhausted? Share with us by commenting below.
Sending extra loves and hugs,
